Book Review #1

Never give up. Never stay down. Always get up. Always move on.

After receiving my first negative review for my first novel Esperanza, I just received another STRONG, POSITIVE review. Out of a 5 star rating system Esperanza got 5 stars. This review as with the other positive reviews recognized the original, powerful, nonlinear story Esperanza is. It's impact on the human spirit and what all struggle with and how it gets to the root and ugly core of the darker side of illegal immigration not many dare look at or talk about.

Being the quiet, humble introvert I am, I usually don't embrace such praise with the loud and proud "look at me" persona an extrovert may. But after getting knocked down for my writing in a previous review this one I am damn proud of. This short and sweet review captures the elements of Esperanza with truth and recognizes the "unique" "original" writer that I am that some may shy away from or dare not try.

Well I hope that those who have been knocked down before in life or are going through a slump take this as a form of inspiration to get back up. Sulking won't get you any where, diving deep into your heart, finding the inner strength and courage to look all who judge in the eyes and "GET UP, and "MOVE ON" will get you there where ever that may be. 


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What Inspires You?

What inspires you? -When the weight of the world is on your shoulders and your back is against the wall sometimes in life we have to go back to those little moments that matter most. We have to get away from the daily grind and redundant work routine. As an author every now and then I have to clear the mind and step away from the writing process. For me it's being with family, traveling and finding peace and harmony from the subtleties of life. This photo of me holding my daughter was taken a year ago in Guanajuato Mexico in a little eccentric cafe. Besides the coffee being amazing this moment with my daughter was joyous. Guanajuato is one of those hidden gems of Mexico with a rich history. It's an isolated city tucked away in central Mexico. Just reflecting back on this day and the time spent there is refreshing. Not only is my daughter my life force but the thought of her is fuel for the heart and soul. -Can you think of a time and place which just fills you with a sense of peace and harmony? A moment to always reflect on when you just want to get away? Please share your thoughts

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Esperanza received it's third official book review. After getting two strong reviews this third one is a little dent in the armor. As with the previous two reviews this review praises Esperanza for its strong non-linear storytelling, the content of the story, the characters, the struggles, the plot, and how it's main plot point of an illegal immigrant is reflective with today's current events. 


As an independent writer and this being my first novel, I got a few jabs and a right, left hook combo from this reviewer regarding my writing being "mundane" and its "slack writing." That's OK these are flaws I recognized in myself and by others (editors, beta readers, and others who have read Esperanza). It's a truth pill that isn't so good to swallow but will make me stronger, something I've been working on and improving with. 


I except this review and I only move on from here. Not everyone will like the way I write or the stories told. That's the reality, that's life. As humans we can't dwell on the negative but use it as fuel to climb higher up the mountains we dare venture up. 


Has anyone else experienced any form of failure, ridicule, or negative judgment with what they do? Please share. 




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Dreams begin to unfold after making many sacrifices, having a strong work ethic/time management, being disciplined, focused, never stopping when failing, but continue to get up and move forward, and last having lots of patience. After receiving another shipment of my novel Esperanza I'm almost out of stock and there has been a flux of online Amazon sales. It's so surreal that this story I started writing 10 years ago about an illegal immigrant woman from Mexico who comes to America and gets separated from her child is reflective during this time of current events. I hope that those who have read Esperanza share this story and their thoughts and those who haven't or are curious take a chance. I did 10 years ago on a dream of becoming an independent author/artist without knowing how to begin or where it would take me and the time of becoming his here. Anyone out there struggling to formulate a dream, chase it, and achieve it, know that there is nothing that can hold you back but you. Block out and drain out the negativity in the world and around you, stay positive, stay true to you and strive for your dreams and anything can be achieved.

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New Shipment of Esperanza

A new shipment of my novel Esperanza has arrived. I can't wait to take these out into the world, interact and share these with those who are interested in a story about an illegal immigrant woman from Mexico who crosses the border into America and gets separated from her child. It's surreal how this story I began writing 10 years ago is reflective to today's current events. I will be venturing out onto the parks/streets/subways/bookstores/cafes of NYC and New Jersey with these books. Some independent author guerrilla tactics for now. DM me if you would like a signed copy sent to you.

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-Persistence; persistence is what has gotten me past the 10years I spent writing, editing, modifying, and publishing my first Novel, Esperanza. From the very beginning I knew that it wasn’t going to be an easy journey, nor a short one. I never knew where the road would take me and when it would end. Along the way there were many challenges, critics, and adversity to overcome.

-The human spirit is strong and once you discover who you are, and you trust in your heart and all that you desire your outer shell becomes just as strong. Nothing will bring you down or stand in your way. All negative forces will be ignored, repelled and not worth your time. The inner strength you behold will be your driving force in perusing whatever it is that you want to achieve.

-For me it was writing my first novel. I knew nothing about the writing process or how to go about writing a book. I taught myself and I learned a lot from my failures and short comings. I wasn’t afraid to continue down the unknown path no matter how frustrating, difficult, or self-destructive it became.

-It is currently April 2018, now eight months since I self-published Esperanza, (August 2017) and the road I am now on is much different and more difficult. Publishing was not the end but the beginning, and this new journey I am now on is an interesting one. Being the introvert I am I must now be an extrovert. I must now not only share Esperanza with the world, but also a part of me, and my life journey. Everyone is unique and original in their own way. My life is no better than anyone else, the same, or different. We all share a universal piece of what living life is all about, yet pursue it in our own light.

-So at this moment, and this point in my life I must continue to be persistent. I’m now swimming in new, deeper and darker waters than before, with bigger sharks out there to bring me down, and stop me from pursuing my dreams of becoming a successful author/writer/artist. Where the tides guide me I do not know, but I will not stop swimming.

-I’ve grown from being a prominent soccer player at the adolescent and collegiate level, winning a 2001 DIV III national championship with the Richard Stockton College of New Jersey mens soccer team, as an independent author self-publishing my first novel, and now continuing to write my second novel The Mime and attempt to get it published traditionally with a publishing company.

-There are other artistic avenues I am continuing to take, create and achieve. New and old writing projects are currently being revisited and shaped along with building a “brand” around me. This is a turning point in the digital age, and the new “brand” is “you/me/I”. We are the product, we are the choice people make daily to listen to, follow, and acquire from.

-So, if there is something for me to share and for you to get out of my experience as an athlete/artist, it’s that persistence is one of the dominant characteristics which I abide by and has gotten me through the toughest of times, past the ignorant ones who judge without knowing and try to stop me and enabled me to carry on, and continue to pursue all I desire without stopping, without giving up.

-Along with all of our personal endeavors we as a human race stand at a crossroads of the next stage of human existence. Politically, economically, and socially the old way of being is dying and phasing out and the birth of a new age is beginning. Whatever the new way of being or living in society will look like, what challenges will come, or destructiveness, persistence is what will enable me, you, and us as a human being to strive.

Being Human

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           We are creators. We are consciousness having an experience in this game called life. We are the manifestation of ourselves. Thoughts create reality and it’s in us to create the world we dream for ourselves.

            This is the beauty of being human that we are able to create something from nothing, and that we hold within ourselves the power to create the experience we desire. We are more powerful than that which tries to hold us back; a control system meant to dumb us down, sedate us, and manipulate our thoughts with fear porn, and keep us in a low vibrational state of being; we are conditioned to think, speak and live negative lifestyles.

            I believe that all humans are born as benevolent beings, and no one is born with sin. It is society which corrupts, spoils, and creates such terrible beings. The trendy fads, bias political talking points of the day, spoon fed news, entertainment, corporate controlled health advice, and way of living is blinding and taste like shit. It’s destroying human beings as a whole. Once you are able to see for yourself and break free from the shackles of dehumanization, then will your true spirit rise up.

            The possibilities in life are limitless once you are able to tap into your true self. Hidden deep inside are untapped dreams waiting to be nourished, chased, and fulfilled; it’s only after discovering who you are that your dreams can begin to manifest.

            The path of self-discovery isn’t easy though, and it isn’t one many are willing to take. Fear is the number one obstacle which will hold people back in life, and prevent individuals from being the most amazing human being that they can be. Once that barrier is breached, then the wall which stops people from continuing down a righteous path of a fulling life is failure. Human beings are plagued with failure, and try to avoid it; yet, failure is one of the richest, most beneficial assets a human being could have.

            Yes, failure will bring you down, eat away your heart and soul, but what it will also do is fuel your drive, that which you desire even more; your heart and soul will be repaired for the better. It will be stronger, and all of the knowledge you gain from failing will enable you to strive even further than before. Failure should be the shadow you always want by your side, your best friend, and motivator to help you leap out further into the unknown.

            This is being human, and this is what it takes to mold a human being into something special. There are many great minds and individuals throughout history from various fields and many different walks of life who have failed miserably, and many times, yet, were able to go above and beyond what the human being is capable of achieving, proving that anything can be attained. 

            From the wheel, to fire, to the seven ancient wonders of the world, the Mona Lisa, the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, the great cathedrals throughout the world, metropolises, literature, music, photography, film, the light bulb, theory of relativity, to modern day technology, there is a vast ocean of magnificent creations made by human beings, which have benefited humans for the better, and have shown us the incredible feats we can overcome and create. All of this from an idea, a simple thought in the mind, which at one point may have seemed crazy, but then again all great minds throughout time have been considered to be crazy.

            Yet, it are these so called insane people, who were thought to be mad, who have proven what great genius we all are as human beings. They were and are a minority within the masses of closed mind human beings, who are in need of an awakening. The time is now, and it seems to be happening to more, more than ever before.

            We are the manifestations of our imaginations, and all that we see around us at one time was a thought. So trust in your heart, and trust in your dreams because anything in life can be achieved. This is the beauty of being human, and this life is worth living.           


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-Before moving forward in life you must first look back; not a quick glance or a long gaze, delving on the could’ve, would’ve should’ve moments, but spend the time to admire all you have passed through, all of those in your life, and all of those who have come into your life, even if just for a single moment in time.


-Take the time to not only reflect on the mental and physical scars you received, but also take the time to appreciate all you have accomplished in the past year, and all you have failed at. There is truth and meaning behind every door you opened, and growth from every experience you had. Use the time to learn from all you have encountered, and figure out how to take the knowledge with you as you move forward into a new year.


-There is wealth which grows from the roots of the past. So instead of uprooting people, and negative experiences from the past, try to trim the weeds, and every now and then water the roots. Keep in touch and reflect on each moment. Those people no matter how negative or wrong a relationship went; came into your life for a reason. There are no coincidences, only a universal consciousness that is connected with heart vibrations. So, all the people and experiences which you have had, you attracted. They came into your life because of love, hate or curiosity. So remember their words, because out of all that was said, there had to be at least one positive element to take with you as you move forward, and remember the experiences no matter how flawed, or negative, because if it wasn’t something that felt good at the moment, or went well, use the predicament or failure as means to learn and grow. Remember the past, future, and present are all connected as one, one thought in your mind which you control.  


-Not only do you have to look back, but you also have to look within. Look deep into your eyes reflecting in the mirror, and go deep within your heart and soul. Get lost in yourself and find that which holds you back in life, and discover that which will take you to higher places in life. The beauty within you is more powerful than all that which appears to be so worthy of your time, and energy.


-Try spending some time alone each day. Even if just for eleven minutes, try to look deep within yourself, and reflect. Clear out the madness, the world around you, the confines of life, and all that which poisons the mind. Don’t be afraid to be alone, and reflect on yourself. Cleanse your heart, mind and soul, just by sitting in a quiet room, maybe with some soothing music, by going for a walk, by pacing around in figure eights, driving around in your car with no direction, or even by sitting in a café with a fresh brew reflecting on you, as the world passes by. Everything is vibration, so move with the universe, connect with your higher self, and trust your intuition; within you’ll find all the answers you need.


-It is only after connecting with yourself, discovering your true self and worth, believing in all you have within, and not being afraid to conquer your dreams without fear of others opinions or all that which tries to hold you back, that you become free. After breaking free from the shackles of normality, and all that which is considered to be an enriched life or the right way to live, then carry on. Open up a new door, and take the unknown path; pave your way through the year ahead, and never stop until you reach all that you desire. Take only all that which is in your heart and all the lessons learned from the past. And don’t forget to spend some time to reflect, because it are those people, words, and little moments from the past, no matter how negative or positive, which brought you to the present moment, which is fuel to carry on to the future unknown. Use tidbits from the past, all from within, and write your own life. The year ahead is full of blank pages, it’s an open book, so write, write without fear, write without regrets, write without confines, write without status or fitting in, write without convictions in others, write from within, write from the heart, and write your own way.  

Vietnam Vet


-Born March 3, 1949

-Dropped out of high school, started working at the age of 17 doing construction, and fixing, repairing, and racing cars.

-Was drafted 1968 and did 1 tour in Vietnam with the 1st Field Force 297 Transportation Co.

-Was honorably discharged, returned to New Jersey, married his girlfriend, had three children, has two grandchildren and lived his life as a master mason, carpenter, construction worker, and jack of all trades handy man

-He is Domenick P. Tutalo Jr., he is my father, the strong silent type who never hesitates to help others, will make any needed sacrifice to support family or friends, and is a gentle soul who has a loving way with children, but to others he is a Vietnam Veteran, who made the ultimate sacrifice which was to serve his country when his name was called, and deserves all the praise and respect in the world


Modest Marine

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-Born February 6, 1925

-Lived during the Great Depression, lived a life that stretches from horse and carriages, Pearl Harbor, to the atomic bomb, to having a man walk on the moon, a president and other prolific figures who fought social injustice be assassinated, a cultural and musical revolution, Vietnam, the cold war, personal computers, Reganomics, the crumbling of the Berlin Wall, Desert Storm, the internet, Apple iphone,  9/11, the war on terror, the 1st Black President, climate change, touch screen technology, and driverless cars 

-Dropped out of high school and enlisted into the Marines March 5, 1943

-Was sent to the Pacific with the 4th Marine Division

-At the age of 20, weighing 120lbs, was a flamethrower who carried 80lbs of two tanks containing fuel and compressed gas on his back on Iwo-Jima February 19 – March 26 1945

-While trying to advance and take the air field, his platoon of 30 men was ambushed and picked off one by one by a sniper in a smoke stack. He was one of three who survived.

-After fighting on Iwo-Jima for the entire 36 days, with no place to hide or take cover, out of about 70,000 American soldiers, about 20,000 were killed; he walked away from Iwo-Jima without a scratch

-When he returned to New Jersey he married his sweetheart and had three children.

-He lived the American Dream, raising a family, and working hard

-He sacrificed two and ¾ years of his life as an enlisted Marine, and spent the rest of his life as a Marine, living it, being it, and joining other service men and women from his generation, and now for many reunions throughout the years

-He is from the greatest generation, who fought fascism, helped preserve, our freedoms and pave the way for the American way of life so many take for granted

-He recently lost his best friend, and brother in arms who fought beside him on Iwo-Jima, Mike “Iron Mike” Mervosh, and is now the last man standing from all of his friends and fellow Marines who fought in the Pacific during WW II with him and is still striving, going strong, and living life as a Marine

-He is currently 92 years old, has 3 children, 11 grandchildren, and 12 great grandchildren

-He is Domenick P. Tutalo, the “Modest Marine”, my grandfather, and to all a veteran who deserves all the praise and respect in the world

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